Don't Call it a Bucket List- I am not Jumping out of a Plane with Morgan Freeman

If I take after my mother's genes, someday I am going to be old and blind with arthritis. Apparently, that is the short list, if I get off easy. I really need to make a list of shit I would like to accomplish before I can't see what I am doing or move in order to do it...

1. Get a tattoo. Small one.
2. Shoot a gun. Small one?
3. See London.
4. See Paris.
5. Get over fear of flying in order to see London and Paris.
6. Visit Cape Cod and Nantucket, because it's really freakin' close and I never seem to get around to it.
7. Develop some sort of retirement plan, other than "Phill works until the day he drops dead".
8. Write a book.
9. Lose a shit-ton of weight.
10. Do a tough mudder or warrior dash event.
11. Learn to wear heels without limping after 15 minutes.
12. Get in a fistfight.
13. Win fistfight.
14. Learn to speak French all over again. I lost it.
15. Master "smokey eye" makeup.
16. Learn about investing...see also "Develop some sort of retirement plan..."
17. ROCK. CLIMBING. WALL.
18. Sex on the beach. Ssshhh.
19. Dress like Joan from Mad Men. And look like Betty Draper from the neck up.
20. Take Phill to China to see the Great Wall I told him he was an idiot for thinking still existed because they tore it down in '83 with David Hasselhoff present. Ooops.

...Soooo there it is. Some may never happen (See numbers 13, 20, and 18 because Phill is too chicken shit), others may happen this year (no fistfight no fistfight no fistfight). But one by one I want to check off as many as possible. Then I can can go blindly rub Ben-Gay on my arthritic joints with a smile.